Remembering Zaffer

[PlaxMacaws]

Today is an extra somber day for me. It's the 1-year anniversary of Zaffer's devastating oral hemorrhage. The substantial blood loss alone he suffered on that day nearly killed him. But it was either an aspiration of some blood or an infliction of some internal trauma from the vet's utilization of an intubation tube that produced his rapidly developing severe respiratory infection and his ensuing violent coughing fits.

Needless to say, August 17, 2022 was an incredibly horrific day in our lives! Today, one year later, Zaf is heavy on my mind. But then I tend to think about him on a continual basis throughout each day. I love and miss him beyond words!

[Dragonlady2]

Zaffer’s life with you was the best thing that happened for him and you. As time goes on, I am hoping, that when you think of him it will bring a smile for the treasured memories and less of the overwhelming sadness.

Our animal family members have a way of weaving their way into our hearts.

[PlaxMacaws]

Zaffer’s life with you was the best thing that happened for him and you. As time goes on, I am hoping, that when you think of him it will bring a smile for the treasured memories and less of the overwhelming sadness.

Thank you, Helena. While I very much appreciate your hope for that development in my life, I can't imagine my loss of Zaf becoming less painful. And if it somehow does so, I can't imagine not experiencing feelings of overpowering guilt for such a diminishment in my level of pain when remembering all that happened to him and our horrific path to his final moments (as contrasted against how things used to be for us). This chapter in my life has been all-consuming for me. But even still, thanks for wishing me the best in days to come.

Our animal family members have a way of weaving their way into our hearts.

Absolutely, without question!

[PlaxMacaws]

Every year on this day, I'm reminded of the pure hell Zaffer experienced during his final months. August 17, 2022 was the day of his horrific oral hemorrhage. That hemorrhage (and/or the emergency vet procedures ensuing therefrom) somehow incited his ongoing violent coughing episodes. They were very hard on his weakened body. He would never be the same after the hemorrhage. Moving forward, life became incredibly difficult and frightening for both of us. Zaf ultimately lost his battle on February 20, 2023.

I recorded some videos of Zaf as he was struggling during the end stage of his ordeal. I often spoke to him in the videos. My intent was to remain by his side and comfort him as well as to produce a video record to share with his vet if needed. As such, in addition to documenting his severe discomfort and his varying states of trying to cope during those moments, I also captured some of my own heartfelt thoughts and emotions. I am not going to post any of the links to those videos... at least right now. I may or may not post some of them at a future point. Alternatively, I may decide to keep all of them private. In lieu of providing said links, today I will highlight the memory of my cherished best friend by re-posting one of my favorite video clips of him. I think it quite nicely expresses the loving, gentle, playful soul my beautiful boy in fact was.




Zaffer may be gone, but he continues to live on in my heart. All that he was has become an integral part of who I am

[Dragonlady2]

He certainly had a playful nature. This is a wonderful video to remember him by. Thank you for sharing.

[PlaxMacaws]

Thanks for your comment, Helena. Yes, he was playful, loving, and just a joy to be around. I've accepted that I'll be grieving him for the rest of my life.

[kendrafitz]

I think of you, Zaf, Salsa and your boys often. I loved the videos and stories of you sweet gentle boy. Sending you love as I know he is as well. He loved you so, so much!

[PlaxMacaws]

I think of you, Zaf, Salsa and your boys often. I loved the videos and stories of you sweet gentle boy. Sending you love as I know he is as well. He loved you so, so much!

Thanks Kendra. That means a lot

[PlaxMacaws]

Three years ago today was one of the most frightening and dangerous days of my life with Zaffer. It was the day of his oral hemorrhage in 2022, an event that nearly took his life. He developed recurring violent coughing fits from trauma inflicted by the breathing tube or from blood he had aspirated. I noticed his oral tumor 18 days later. Zaf remained alive for another 6 months.

I'm thinking of you, my cherished friend