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Thread: Help grow the bond betweeen Katie and hubby

 
  1. #1
    Member
    MacawMomma's Avatar


    Parrots

    Katie- 23 yr old Catalina Macaw

    Help grow the bond betweeen Katie and hubby

    I know we are still in our honeymoon period but last night Katie did not want to step up for my husband at all, she even bit him which she's never done (she doesn't bite hard at all thank goodness)

    He's great with her so he just stepped back and gave her time. The only alarming behavior is that anytime I left the room she'd start screaming and looking for me.

    I know that birds might get bonded to one person more than another but is there any tools to encourage her to be closer to my husband? He works long days so during the week so I spend the most time with her during the day. So I can see how it would be normal for her to bond to her caretaker. Another point is that her previous owner was a female and I might remind her of her.

    Help! Hubby needs Katie love too!!!

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Casper's 2nd best friend's Avatar


    Parrots

    Casper, a blue fronted Amazon. Loves banana. Hates plastic bags and red coats.
    It took nine months before Casper realised I was an OK person. What sealed the deal was he found out I was better than Margaret at head scratching.
    "A busy beak is a happy beak" - David Strom

  3. The following 4 users like this post:

    Dragonlady2 (06-30-2017), Lady (07-02-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017), PlaxMacaws (07-01-2017)

  4. #3
    Member
    MacawMomma's Avatar


    Parrots

    Katie- 23 yr old Catalina Macaw
    Awwww- I have the long nails so maybe I'll have hubby grow out his?? Haha

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    Casper's 2nd best friend (07-01-2017), PlaxMacaws (07-01-2017)

  6. #4
    Super Moderator
    Dragonlady2's Avatar


    Parrots

    Willy-Eclectus, Oliver-alexandrine, Mookie-Senegal, Bella- Australian King, Joey and Peewee- Barrabands, Peachiegirl-Peachfront conure, Pepper- crimson belly conure, Peanut-plum head, Babyblue-parrotlette, Harry and Louie-canaries.
    Moving to your home would have been quite an adjustment for Katie, so some of her behaviour may be related to this. It takes some birds a long time to settle. Seeing as her previous caregiver was a woman, she may just be used to females. Have you connected with the previous owner to see if she displayed these behaviours with her?
    For now, your husband could give her treats, her food etc., letting her see that he isn't a threat to her relationship with you and he will give her good things.
    She may also not be used to men and could require extra time to develop the relationship with him.

    As to her screaming when you leave the room, that will be a hard habit to break. Maybe you could come up with a whistle or a call that can reassure her that you are still around. She probably needs help to learn to entertain herself. Encourage foraging behaviour to keep her busy. Wrap up a favorite treat in paper in front of her and let her try to find it. My birds like watching cartoons. Does she play with/chew toys?

    Hopefully others will be along with some suggestions.

  7. The following 3 users like this post:

    Lady (07-02-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017), PlaxMacaws (07-01-2017)

  8. #5
    Senior Member
    Casper's 2nd best friend's Avatar


    Parrots

    Casper, a blue fronted Amazon. Loves banana. Hates plastic bags and red coats.
    Aye, Margaret always puts her cooking apron on in front of Casper when she is going to be spending some time in the kitchen. He has come to accept that this means he is going to have to amuse himself, or more likely, have a doze for a while.
    Helena also mentions entertainment, her birds like cartoons but Casper likes music and has some favourite artists (e.g. Shania Twain) who are not necessarily on either Margaret or my playlists. We experiment with youtube music to see what he might like.
    I think Kendra has problems with Rosie screaming when she is out of sight so she will probably be interested to hear if you come up with a solution.
    "A busy beak is a happy beak" - David Strom

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    Dragonlady2 (06-30-2017), Lady (07-02-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017), PlaxMacaws (07-01-2017)

  10. #6
    Senior Member
    PlaxMacaws's Avatar


    Parrots

    B&G (Jack) | MM (Maynard) - RIP | Hy (Zaf) - RIP | GW (Salsa) | NC (Bozley)
    Yes, and I'm sure Kendra will be happy to share her trials, failures and successes at curtailing Rosie's screaming fits. Kendra well knows about the separation discontentment and tenacity of an insistent macaw girl like Katie. I think Rosie has been quite a handful for her through the years.

    And as Helena suggested, you might try asking your husband to frequently offer Katie treats and even deliver her food and water replenishments -with you out of the room- when he's home (obviously). Hopefully by doing so Katie will also learn to accept him as an important person in her life. As Jean-Pierre noted, though, when it comes to parrots these things can take some time
    He wanted to live. He was my Heaven... He's gone!

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    Casper's 2nd best friend (07-01-2017), Dragonlady2 (07-01-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017)

  12. #7
    Senior Member
    kendrafitz's Avatar


    Parrots

    Rosie, our Greenwing Macaw (Hatchday 4/1/12)
    I wish I could offer advice about getting your husband and Katie to bond. It's awesome that your husband wants a relationship with her. My husband really wants nothing to do with Rosie, thus no real advice. I bet if he gives her some pine nuts here and there and chats with her or even reads aloud near her cage she will respond well. As others have said, it just takes time.

    The screaming is an issue at our house. Rosie is super bonded to me and screams if I leave her sight with some exceptions. She also screams when I go to the kitchen from the family room even though those rooms are open concept rooms so she can see me 10 feet from her. She yells a lot, my Rosie is a very demanding girl. If I take to long to get her once UP!?!? is demanded (I'm talking 10 seconds here) screaming ensues.

    I have tried telling her screaming is not nice, giving her time outs, and putting her on the floor. The best results are really from ignoring her until she stops screaming. That is difficult here because my husband works from home. So I have to keep her quiet. When he is away on business trips it works wonderfully.

    The problem is parrots are SMART. Just like toddlers they know what they can get away with and test limits. So when my husband is home, we get lots of bratty behavior. It's even worse when the kids are home as well. Rosie knows as soon as she starts yelling, every human in the house starts yelling for me to get her. She also knows when I'm the only one home, I will ignore her yelling. So she will give up after one or two tries.

    Other than ignoring, I have had decent results with getting her and putting her on the floor. If I do that consistently after the 2nd time or so she will chill out. I just say stop yelling or I will put you on the floor. Do you want to go on the floor? Usually the first two times she yells, but the third time or so, she will say NO!!! and stop.

    It's all about consistency, which in my house isn't the easiest. But if you can be consistent with Katie, you should have good results.

    Think of Katie as an eternal toddler. Fun and sweet but challenging as well. Oh, I just thought that if your husband sings, dances or acts silly as you would with a toddler he might get a good reaction. I have found that macaws love the same over the top silly behavior toddlers do.
    Rosie & Kendra


  13. The following 5 users like this post:

    Casper's 2nd best friend (07-01-2017), Dragonlady2 (07-01-2017), Lady (07-02-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017), PlaxMacaws (07-01-2017)

  14. #8
    Senior Member
    Casper's 2nd best friend's Avatar


    Parrots

    Casper, a blue fronted Amazon. Loves banana. Hates plastic bags and red coats.
    The problem is parrots are SMART. Just like toddlers they know what they can get away with and test limits.
    All our problems - in a nutshell
    "A busy beak is a happy beak" - David Strom

  15. The following 5 users like this post:

    Dragonlady2 (07-01-2017), kendrafitz (07-01-2017), Lady (07-02-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017), plax (07-01-2017)

  16. #9
    Senior Member
    Casper's 2nd best friend's Avatar


    Parrots

    Casper, a blue fronted Amazon. Loves banana. Hates plastic bags and red coats.
    I've just remembered something else for you to try: Make a game of getting Katie to step-up backwards and forwards between you and your husband. This was apparently quite successful last time I suggested it.
    "A busy beak is a happy beak" - David Strom

  17. The following 4 users like this post:

    Dragonlady2 (07-01-2017), kendrafitz (07-01-2017), MacawMomma (07-01-2017), plax (07-01-2017)

  18. #10
    Member
    MacawMomma's Avatar


    Parrots

    Katie- 23 yr old Catalina Macaw
    Thank you all SO much for your invaluable advice!!!

    So many good ideas!!!

    She's getting better, as long as I'm not in the room for the first 15 minutes when he gets home she is more than happy to step up for him and let him scratch her head.

    I then come in and it's gotten better, she used to just watch me like a hawk (pun intended) with her foot up. Hahaha

    I agree with you Kendra, ignoring her screaming helped tremendously! I never come and grab her when she's screaming

    Right now, I'm working on being very consistent yet giving her time and patience to adjust to her new home


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  19. The following 5 users like this post:

    Casper's 2nd best friend (07-01-2017), Dragonlady2 (07-01-2017), kendrafitz (07-01-2017), Lady (07-02-2017), plax (07-01-2017)

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