Low Experience, High Enthusiasm: Opinions for first-time adoption?

[Pudgerigar]

Need some opinions, y'all!

I assumed, since I only have a single budge at the moment, that it would take me a while to "level up" to caring for bigger, more intensive birds. Fate says "too dang bad" and in June I'll be bringing home a grumpy 45yr old blue-fronted Amazon named Bonita.

She's a rescue and lives at the local bird specialty shop, and is fine there but very much needs and deserves more personal time, space, and care. No major behavioral issues besides standoffishness/biting/picky eating. I fell in love with her at first sight and expressed great interest in her, visiting a couple times a week since December. She recognizes me now, takes cashews from my hand, vocalizes for me and yesterday aaaaaaalmost stepped up for me but then decided to give me a warning open-beak snarl instead. I adore her and refer to her as "my bird wife".

I worry though, because:
a) I only have practical experience with budgies, tiels, lorikeets and conures and only the first of those was my personal bird and
b) I didn't want to put her adoption fee down if someone who could take her sooner were to come along and be a better option. However, I've just been informed by all the staff and volunteers that they've turned people down with me in mind, and everyone there is dead set on her being with me!

I'm flattered, but worried.

This sounds weird and rambly but I guess I'm looking for either an admonition or confirmation from people I respect that Know These Things that I'm not a terrible person for hoping I'm capable of diving head first into a rescue bird. I'm prepared for her to never care for me. I'm prepared to lose bits of flesh. I'm prepared to take her straight to the certified avian vet nearby and keep up with it. I'm prepared to build my home around her needs, and not to try to mold her set ways to mine. I just can't get rid of that nagging feeling that I'm somehow being selfish and I'm not "supposed" to jump right into the pool with a beautiful grumpy fat arthritic middle-aged huge bird. Thoughts?



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[Penny]

How do you really feel about the beautiful grumpy fat arthritic middle-aged bird? Is the love for the bird enough that you want to change your life for it? Don't get me wrong, I am not saying no, or yes. I have a beautiful grumpy fat arthritic middle-aged husband and I'm totally happy with all the changes I made in my life to make it comfortable for him. With most parrots, especially the larger ones, you aren't choosing a pet so much as a forever roommate, so the comparison is not quite as crazy as it might initially sound. It seems as if she is vocal, and has been among humans for a long time, did you ask her if she wants to live with you? She might have a definite opinion. When we first were trying to decide if I should get Kiki, as I was getting ready to leave she actually grabbed my finger and wouldn't let go! You are not a horrible person for thinking you can dive in, you are a thoughtful person for thinking about it clearly before diving in, and I am sure whatever choice you make for Bonita and yourself, it will be the right one.

[Pudgerigar]

Thank you for responding, Penny!

I'm devoted to building my life around her, and currently that's not as hard as it sounds. I mentioned I'll be taking her in June; this is because I'm in a transition period right now, moving from youth to firm adulthood and independence, and I'll have my first roommate-less home the first of June, just the wife and I (she's very devoted as well). Everything from the place I'm choosing to the furniture I have yet to buy to the design of the rooms can be chosen to accommodate parrot-keeping life.
She vocalizes, but clear speech isn't her strong suit. I've asked before if she'd like to come with me. I've told her I was asking Miss Amy (shop owner) if I could be her person now. She hasn't reacted negatively, but there's not a clear positive response either. I'm optimistically chalking this up to her haughty and disdainful front she likes to put on. Staff is mostly impressed that she doesn't seem to resent my presence, if that says anything. Her past until a couple years ago is unknown, she was dropped off, but I feel she spent a very long time being badly neglected.
I guess it comes down to: she doesn't dislike me as much as she does being in a room full of screechy Quakers and bustling strangers attempting to talk to her, and I love her fiercely enough that I don't care if she never likes me much, I don't care if she bites me every day, I'll take out stock in Band-Aid. I just want her near me and to provide a peaceful and loving environment where maybe she'll take to one of us and we can coax out the happy bird in there. She has anywhere from one to forty more years in there and being hassled by boisterous baby sun conures and eight year old people shouldn't be her fate.


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[Casper's 2nd best friend]

A wonderful reply from Penny. We brought Casper home basically because he chose Margaret when we were trying to rehome him for my mother who was going into a home. He made it very clear that Margaret was his new Best Friend. So, despite us knowing zilch about bird welfare we rearranged our lives, cancelled the idea of long sailing holidays and moved my vinyl record collection to another room to make space for him.
We do not regret it at all. So my opinion is, if the bird is compliant, go for it and make the rest of it's life as happy as you can. At forty five she is already getting on and needs a comfortable retirement. Our vet recons that 35 to 50 is a good age for an amazon so she is doing well.
Casper used to bite me seriously a lot at first but now is happy to just play fight. In the evenings he divides his time between the two of us, letting us know when it is the other ones turn.

[mdg1109]

I am new to birds also and we had parakeets for 5 years before I decided I wanted another bird. We did our research and we thought we were going to get a Caique. We went to the local bird specialty store and spent a couple of hours looking at different birds and I happened upon a Lesser Sulphur Crested Citron Cockatoo. She was friendly, talkative, a little nippy, but I fell in love with the cockatoo personality.

We came back home and did some research and we now have Charlie, our 4 month old LSC2. He chose us. We went to the breeder to meet him and he snuggled right into me and was very good with my two sons.

My point being is that I think the birds chose us, it sounds like Bonita is giving the best of herself to you and you have already realized that she might be like this and you are OK with that. You are wanting to give her a better life and I am sure after she settles in, she will realize that.

[spiritbird]

I have never had the privilege of an Amazon parrot in my life so I will leave any advice to others that do. I do hope you have all the successes in the world with Bonita. You are a patient person so that will go a long way to providing Bonita with the enrichment all Parrots love. Please ask as many questions as you need to here. Remember there are no stupid questions.

[Sucre]

It sounds as if you have the best of intentions, and patience. And you are okay with it if she never gives you anymore than she is right now, so that's a plus. High expectations can spoil the best of plans. The best thing is that you're researching and asking questions and honestly THINKING about what you are getting ready to do!

I will say this... The personality you see in the pet shop may not be the personality you see when you bring her home. The bird you see the first couple of weeks in your home may not be the bird you see when the "honeymoon" period is over. It could improve, it could worsen. She could develop a strong dislike towards you or your spouse, and that can be a problem that you may or may not be able to solve. It is a HUGE jump from budgies, conures and cockatiels to a large parrot - my husband and I just learned that lesson the hard way a few months ago, sadly at the cockatoos expense.

I cannot tell you how much I can appreciate what is coming from your heart on this! I can feel what you're feeling and why you want her out of that environment and want to give her a good life. But this is going to be life altering for you and your spouse, it's huge, so I am glad you're asking questions and talking it through. You sound like you'll be an amazing parront!

[Pudgerigar]

Thanks y'all :)

I heard about poor Sucre :c my heart aches for you.

I have good news! Bonita was more curious than ever today, vocalizing in her low grumbly way and scooting to me on her perch long before I made it known I had treats! She's sort of hovering between wanting to trust me and being wary. Several false starts for stepping up, a couple of the gentlest warning nips I've seen on a beak that size (very grateful). Then one of the staff came to help me get her back in the cage (she climbed out to see me!) and while he had her on his arm, he offered it to me... this happened.

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[spiritbird]

Wow your Amazon is a big bird! I am so used to little birds. Sounds like Bonita is getting more comfortable with you. Good Job!

[The Pinkertons]

She's yours and you are her person. GO FOR IT! you have all the right elements to make it a beautiful life experience for the both of you! :anipapp: what are you waiting for go get her! :th_smile:

[mdg1109]

YAY!!! So excited for you! What an accomplishment. Let us know when you get her home and how she has settled in :loveit:

[Pudgerigar]

That's MY Bonita, I'm certain now! I put more pics up in the photos section!


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[Penny]

Looks like she gave you an answer! :loveit:

[Macaw Lover]

Why is it that you have wait until June to bring that little one home now that you know she has chosen you? That would be a long time for her and would have to be confusing to her when you keep leaving. I hope you can work things out and start her new life sooner rather than later, you both deserve that.

[Pudgerigar]

Macaw Lover it breaks my heart, too, but I actually think just ramping up the frequency of my visits is helping her. She's very accustomed to the bird shop, and I'm a strange newcomer to her routine. I don't want to just swoop in and "steal" her! She's not yet at that point I think where if I took her she'd be pleased.

The actual reasoning though is that I won't have a house to put her in until June! We just moved to this state for my wife's work in October, and we've been renting a single bedroom in a two bedroom house. All our belongings and life have to fit into this room. June we'll be moving into our own place.

Update on Bonita: still won't step up of her own accord, but gave it several attempts today (touching my arm with her foot but changing her mind). We also had a bit of a misunderstanding. She hasn't been attempting to bite me 80% of the time, she was trying to taste me! She just wanted to mouth me with her beak to get more information. Spent a minute licking my rainbow tie-dye shirt in wonder!

Still standoffish, but if I dare turn around and play with a another bird she vocalizes at me like "hey! Hey just because I ACT like I want you to buzz off doesn't mean you get to make that decision! And those are MY treats you're handing out!"

Bossy little lady ;)


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[Macaw Lover]

Now I get it and yes, leaving her there for the time being would be best for you

Here is an idea for stepping up on you. One of the vets I took Kalea to a few years back had me sit down in a chair while she did a history on her while the vet was also sitting in a chair with our knees maybe touching or maybe not actually touching. Anyway, we humans were talking while Kalea was sitting on my lap and getting touches from me. Low key, just 2 people talking, little birdie not stressed but rather relaxed then the vet just sort of casually scoops Kalea up and over to her lap. You could tell Kalea was asking "what just happened, how did I end up here" but still was relaxed and did not freak out because The Mama was still there, just on a different lap.

Maybe try that move and when she makes it to your lap let her explore you and with any luck, after a little bit just lay one arm on your lap between her and your body and see if she just steps onto it herself.

[Pudgerigar]

Ooooh I think I could try a modified version of that. She's not terribly comfortable with anyone at all except the groomer, and he's only there every other weekend. I might just go down there and sit next to her cage for a bit, not interacting, maybe casually chatting with the staff... judging by her recent vocalizing I'm pretty sure she'd try to get in on it and be included.


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[The Pinkertons]

I am so excited for You and Bonita . I love reading all about the updates. Please keep us posted every step of the way on your journey!

[Pudgerigar]

!!!!!!!!!!!! BONITA STEPPED UP TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!
I've been using the tactic of holding a treat just out of reach and holding my arm up as the only way to get to it. Every time she put her foot on I praised her in a gentle tirade of "good girl, thank you Bonita, that's so good, yes!" and if she went to bite I just moved my arm down and said "nooooo no no, that's not nice" in a calm tone. It seemed to work, I got more and more feet and less and less beak. Couple of false starts, where she'd wrap one foot around my arm and then change her mind and go to bite. Then she'd finally had enough of testing the water and followed up with her other foot! I was very shocked, and I think she seemed a bit surprised at herself. As much as I value my eyeballs, she's an older bird and has arthritis so I let her sidle up to my upper arm for stability, so she could actually eat her treat. I lavished more praise and we went for a short walk around the room, then I let her back off inside her cage. Next time she does it I'll probably go take a seat and let her chill with me for a while. She looked SO satisfied with herself! At this rate she'll have no problem by June 1st ;)


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[mdg1109]

!!!!!!!!!!!! BONITA STEPPED UP TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!
I've been using the tactic of holding a treat just out of reach and holding my arm up as the only way to get to it. Every time she put her foot on I praised her in a gentle tirade of "good girl, thank you Bonita, that's so good, yes!" and if she went to bite I just moved my arm down and said "nooooo no no, that's not nice" in a calm tone. It seemed to work, I got more and more feet and less and less beak. Couple of false starts, where she'd wrap one foot around my arm and then change her mind and go to bite. Then she'd finally had enough of testing the water and followed up with her other foot! I was very shocked, and I think she seemed a bit surprised at herself. As much as I value my eyeballs, she's an older bird and has arthritis so I let her sidle up to my upper arm for stability, so she could actually eat her treat. I lavished more praise and we went for a short walk around the room, then I let her back off inside her cage. Next time she does it I'll probably go take a seat and let her chill with me for a while. She looked SO satisfied with herself! At this rate she'll have no problem by June 1st ;)


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That is wonderful news! I am so excited for the both of you! June will be here before you know it! :goodjob:

[Lady]

Wonderful wonderful news!!!! Great job to both of you~

[PlaxMacaws]

!!!!!!!!!!!! BONITA STEPPED UP TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!
I've been using the tactic of holding a treat just out of reach and holding my arm up as the only way to get to it. Every time she put her foot on I praised her in a gentle tirade of "good girl, thank you Bonita, that's so good, yes!" and if she went to bite I just moved my arm down and said "nooooo no no, that's not nice" in a calm tone. It seemed to work, I got more and more feet and less and less beak. Couple of false starts, where she'd wrap one foot around my arm and then change her mind and go to bite. Then she'd finally had enough of testing the water and followed up with her other foot! I was very shocked, and I think she seemed a bit surprised at herself. As much as I value my eyeballs, she's an older bird and has arthritis so I let her sidle up to my upper arm for stability, so she could actually eat her treat. I lavished more praise and we went for a short walk around the room, then I let her back off inside her cage. Next time she does it I'll probably go take a seat and let her chill with me for a while. She looked SO satisfied with herself! At this rate she'll have no problem by June 1st ;)That sounds like some remarkable progress to me :D

[Pudgerigar]

Hey folks, gonna wrap this thread up so as not to spam the board, and do my updates here:
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[plax]

Hey folks, gonna wrap this thread up so as not to spam the board, and do my updates here:
[Users must be registered and logged in to view attached photos or hyperlinks] that case, I'll lock it for you.