JOKE of The Day, Week, Month Year yadda yadda yadda I'm sure you get it!

[Mr Peepers]

Post up some funny jokes here folks. Give other members a smile! :th_biggrin:


I just met John and Jane Doe and their lovely children, Play, Tornay, Potay, and Alfred. :th_biggrin:


WHAT DO WE WANT? A cure for Short Term Memory Loss!
WHEN DO WE WANT IT? When do we want what?


Remember when Twitter was called "Graffiti?"


Somewhere, a smart laser eye surgeon has a waiting room with brochures that are all slightly out of focus.


What goes "Ooooooooo." .......... A cow with no lips. :th_biggrin:

[Mr Peepers]

Come and have a smile and post a joke!


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[Mare]

Knock, knock..

Who's there?..

Wooden shoe..

Wooden shoe who?..

Wooden shoe like to know?!! Heehee!!

[PeachyDoll]

Knock, knock..

Who's there?..

Wooden shoe..

Wooden shoe who?..

Wooden shoe like to know who ate your wooden shoe? ~Love Amigo~



And that's what you get when you leave your wooden shoes lying around with a cockatoo in the house :th_hehe:

[Mare]

Heehee! :). That's a good one PD! So true, too!

[Mr Peepers]

Knock Knock....


Who's there?


Stupid clown jerk........


Stupid clown jerk who?


Donald Trump




(well I thought it was funny and made sense :th_biggrin:)

[Mr Peepers]

Q: What do you get when you cross a parrot and a centipede?
A: A walkie-talkie.


Q: Why did the parrot wear a raincoat?
A: Because she wanted to be a Polly unsaturated!


A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a parrot sitting next to him. "Are you a parrot?" asked the man, surprised. "Yes." "What are you doing at the movies?" The parrot replied, "Well, I liked the book."



Mrs. Davidson's dishwasher quit working so she calls a repairman. Since she has to go to work the next day, she tells him, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dish-washer, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you the check. Oh, by the way, don't worry about my bulldog; he won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do not, under any circumstances, talk to the parrot!"

When the repairman arrives at Mrs. Davidson's apartment the next day, he discovers the biggest and meanest Bull Dog he has ever seen. But just as she said, the dog just lays there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his business.

The Parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing, and name-calling. Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, "Shut up, you stupid ugly bird!"

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"

[Mr Peepers]

One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on an exotic parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher.

Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid. The fine bird was finally his! As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the Auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk!"

"Don't worry," said the Auctioneer, "He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"


:th_rofl:

[Mr Peepers]

A woman gets up, puts up the shades, takes the cover off her parrot's cage, makes coffee, and has a cigarette. Suddenly the phone rings. Her boyfriend is coming over. She puts out the cigarette, pulls down the shades, puts the cover back on the parrot's cage, and gets back into bed. The parrot, from under the cloth says: "Well that was a short dang day!"

[PeachyDoll]

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[PeachyDoll]

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[spiritbird]

3194

[Mr Peepers]

Two duck hunters out on the marsh duck hunting. One says to the other, "we're not having much luck today getting any ducks." The other one says, " maybe we're not throwing the dog high enough."



This guy buys a parrot. Every morning he stands in front of the cage and asks in a pleasant voice, "Can you talk?" This goes on for weeks with absolutely no response from the bird. Finally one morning, totally fed up, he shouts, "CAN YOU TALK, YOU STUPID MORONIC BIRD? CAN YOU TALK?" The bird looks him in the eye and says "I can talk, all right. Can you fly?"

[colbon2]

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[Mr Peepers]

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One of the original ANGRY BIRDS! :th_biggrin:

[Mr Peepers]

The only yoga stretch I've perfected is a yawn.


I picked a bad week to get out of bed.


My thoughts ought to be ashamed of themselves. :th_wink:


Smart phone users need to get their heads out of their apps.

[colbon2]

hahahahahaha love it

[Mare]

How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it!

How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it! :)

[PeachyDoll]

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[Mr Peepers]

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[Mr Peepers]

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[Mr Peepers]

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[Mr Peepers]

colbon2 :th_biggrin:


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[Mr Peepers]

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[Mr Peepers]

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